5 Restaurants Where Bruce Would Not Dine
What makes a restaurant? As you are discovering with our Eat Lafayette program it’s all about the food. In South Louisiana ambiance is nice but if your food isn’t great you might as well be selling bait. Over the next few weeks you can dine right here at home and enjoy the best of South Louisiana Culinary majesty, save money and support local business too. I do hope you will Eat Lafayette.
Now let’s talk about some places that aren’t in the Lafayette area and I will explain why I wouldn’t even darken the door to go in them.
Dinner In The Sky: Brussels Belgium. I have actually been near this place but in now way shape, form or fashion would I eat there. I don’t care if they had the best boudin balls and field peas in the world I would not dine at Dinner in the Sky. I am afraid of heights and since this entire dining facility is suspended from a crane high above the ground I won’t be going there. There are now several other locations where you can dine above the ground in case Brussels isn’t in your travel plans. Did you know in Belgium they put mayonnaise on their fries instead of ketchup?
The Clinic: Singapore. When I say the words ‘hospital food” fine dining doesn’t spring right to the forefront of your brain does it? That’s what the clinic is all about. It is supposed to be drinks and fine dining served in a unique setting. If you like sitting in a hospital atmosphere and your chair has wheels, as in wheelchair then be my guest. The place reminds of eating in one of those psycho movies. I would keep expecting Jack Nicholson to jump out with dessert and then cut my head off.
Modern Toilet: Taipei. A phrase I hear a lot on the Food Network is “we eat first with our eyes”. If that is the case then nobody, I mean nobody except for my dog is going to eat at this place. The food could be wonderful but I would never know because the serving dish is a toilet. That’s right the instrument we use to dispose of already digested food becomes the serving vessel for the food we are eating. I must admit the chamber pots do look to be exceptionally clean but I still wouldn’t eat out of them unless I had a long handled brush to floss with afterward.
Ithaa Restaurant: Indian Ocean. Did you notice where I said this place was? The Indian Ocean, not on the shore or the beach or the banks of the Indian Ocean but in the gosh darn ocean. This restaurant I would at least like to walk into. Its dining facility is underwater and you have a spectacular view of the living creatures that were killed to make your meal. It’s like stopping in a Bambi’s for some venison and having Bambi just sit and watch you eat. Awkward!
Dark Restaurant: Beijing. Do you remember the “eat with your eyes” comment I made a little earlier in this narrative? Well at Dark Restaurant you can’t eat with your eyes because the whole darn place is totally dark. So it is up the other senses, taste, smell, touch and I hope to God you don’t hear your dinner screaming! I wouldn’t like this place for a couple of reasons. Total darkness really creeps me out and Chinese food is so whacked out, I’d really want to see what I was eating. My wife went to China last summer and brought back some menu’s from the places she had eaten. Any thing that has body parts you can’t talk about in public on the menu is a place I want to avoid.
Those are some odd ball places based upon my sheltered American palate. What is the strangest restaurant you’ve ever dined in? How about the strangest thing you’ve ever eaten? I know this is Louisiana so you have to get way out there to be really strange around us don’t you? I would love to hear your feedback and I do hope you will continue to support our hometown restaurants especially during Eat Lafayette, now through August 15.