Adultery-Detecting Mattress Is the Latest in Romance Ruination
Odds are if you need to buy this mattress your relationship is doomed.
A Spanish company called Durmet is offering the Smarttress, which comes with something called the Lover Detection System, a technological breakthrough that alerts your smartphone to let you know your partner is boinking anyone and everyone who isn't you.
Coming with a price tag of $1,750, it's a fortune, but it may still be cheaper than the hit your bank account will take hiring a private detective to follow your wife around and then the lawyer to make sure you keep the car, the house, the dog and his kibble.
How exactly does it work? There are vibration sensors in the bed springs and tools to measure impact and intensity that will let you know if something is amiss when you're not there.
As the ad says, "If your partner isn't faithful, at least your mattress is."
It may sound like a good idea on the surface, but if you have to buy one to keep tabs on your partner, then you two are not destined to spend eternity together.
Your relationship may end well before you catch the other person fooling around, too. Once he or she discovers you've coughed up almost $1,800 on the bed, chances are you're going to have a whopper of a fight that ends with you breaking up.