Want to Have a Tropical Cyclone Named After Someone?

What's in a name? William Shakespeare answered that question more than a few years ago. Motivational speaker Dale Carnegie had this to say about names, "A person’s name is to that person, the sweetest, most important sound in any language". So, I get it, our names are a big deal.

See? Billy Shakespeare was right about the roses.

I understand the need for branding among corporations, that's why they spend millions upon millions of dollars to have their moniker affixed to sporting venues and other public facilities. However, I personally don't understand why anyone would want to have their name connected with something as potentially destructive and deadly as a hurricane.

But, believe it or not, some people actually want to do that. 

Fortunately for those misguided individuals the answer to our headline question concerning having a tropical cyclone named in your honor or to honor someone you love? Hate? Want to bring the ill will too? is no.

No, you can't request or even pay for the honor of having a hurricane or tropical system named for yourself or someone you want to "honor".

Okay, then how do Hurricane names get chosen?

Hurricane names are compiled by the World Meteorological Organization. They have six rotating lists of names that alternate between male and female monikers. The only way those lists ever change is if a hurricane name is retired. Just yesterday the WMO announced they would be retiring the names, Laura and Dorian, from the rotation. The group also announced it would no longer use the Greek alphabet if a storm season exceeds 21 named storms.

Personally, I don't know why you'd want to have something as awful as a hurricane named for yourself or someone you genuinely care about. There have been many cases of people who just by sheer coincidence have the same name as a deadly storm being subject to ridicule and unnecessary teasing. Who would want that?

So, if you're looking for that "one-of-a-kind gift" you won't be able to find it in the tropics during hurricane season. Instead, maybe you could spend your hard-earned money on another worthless endeavor, you know, naming a star after someone.

If you look really closely at the picture below you can clearly see, Dave. That's the name I gave my star.

While stars usually aren't deadly to the human race the fact that there is a good chance the "star" you've been named after has already burned out makes that money grab an even dumber investment. Oh, and if you're one of the many who have spent money on naming a star for someone or yourself congratulations you've just proven what P.T. Barnum said more than 100 years ago still holds true.

But, if you happen to need help in coming up with a name we do have these suggestions for you.