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Bruce’s Big Boy Fear Of Water Parks [Video]

There aren’t many things on this planet that really scare me. I do get concerned about hurricanes, elected officials and running out of ice cream. Water parks, they scare me. I think the reason water parks scare me is there are so many ways for so many things to go wrong.

As a portly gentleman I am already self conscious about my appearance in beach attire. Then comes the whole issue of physics. I don’t claim to be a scientist but here is how it feels to me. The more mass and weight an object has on it, the bigger the effect of forces like gravity, centrifugal force and physical stress.

I know, I once went down a water slide in Niagara Falls at what seemed like 300 mph. I know it was slightly less than that but still when I hit the water I skipped three times before I finally broke the surface of the water. When I finally came to the surface after what seemed like three hours underwater the life guard was standing next to me holding my swimming trunks and a towel.

Is it all in my mind about water parks? I think this video shows another shady side of what can happen to those of us who are blessed with more mass than some of our other pool goers.

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