You think NASCAR doesn't make sense? I am submitting for your approval at least 5 other things that are dumber. I am a fan of NASCAR, not a fanatic, a fan. I like the strategy, the physics and the engineering too. I have some friends that kid me about car racing by recounting the Jeff Dunham bit about "and they're making another left turn".  To the casual observer I can see why you'd think that, if you go deeper there really is more to the sport than wrecking and turning left. As dumb as you might think car racing is, I have found 5 other things that make even less sense. Let's see if you agree.

 

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Priority Boarding Lanes at Airport Gates: There is only one door to go down the jetway to the plane. The airline people have decided that even before you get on the plane they are going to point out to you that you are a subspecies. The entrance to the same door that leads to the same plane that is going to same destination is divided into two lines by a piece of material suspended between two removable posts. Woe be unto the weary traveler that accidentally walks down the wrong side of the rope. He will be chastised by a stressed out former stripper and sent to the back of the commoners line. It makes no sense. I understand letting priority (people who pay more) passengers get on first, but having two lines to go through the same door is dumber than NASCAR.

 

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Lining Up For A Concert That You Have Reserved Seats For: We all get excited about going to concerts and seeing our favorite singers display their talents. This past Friday night a lot of us went to see Jason Aldean. Several thousand of us stood in a line that extended from the Cajundome doors through the tunnel under Cajundome Boulevard, why? I know there was a "general admission" pit area in front of the stage but most of us knew exactly where our seats were going to be. You could have used that time to come over to the 97.3 The Dawg truck and win backstage passes! Standing in line when you already have a reserved seat is dumber than NASCAR.

 

 

 

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Coffee House Ordering Language: I came in for a cup of coffee not to learn a new foreign language. It doesn't make my coffee taste any different if you call it venti, trenta, tall, short, DaQueesha or small. It is a freaking cup of coffee. Small, medium, large, extra large and biggun have worked well for t-shirt sizes, why not for coffee too.  The language we are forced to use to order a cup of coffee is dumber than NASCAR

 

 

 

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Insurance Regulations: I am not feeling well I need to see a doctor who should I call? Naturally, my insurance company to see which doctor I am allowed to see on my plan. That makes as much sense as calling a teenager to get advice on time management. I don't understand all the inner workings of insurance, healthcare and greed but I am told these regulations are in place mainly because of lawyers. The bottom line is this, when I need my insurance to help me, I need it. I don't need a lot of red tape, paper work and hours on hold waiting for answers. Insurance regulations are dumber than NASCAR.

 

 

 

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Salad Bar Untensils and Traffic Flow: I love a good salad. There are some great salad bars in Acadiana. There are some total idiots that try to use them at the same time as me. Salad bars have a natural intuitive and implied traffic flow. You start with a plate and end up by the croutons. There is no need to dart in and out of the line to grab a pickled okra or a boiled egg. Wait your turn and grab it when you go by. The other issue with salad bars is the choice of utensils they provide for grabbing stuff. Tongs are nice for salad and big hunks of broccoli but they don't work for cheese, boiled egg or any other sticky ingredient. Around the cheese bucket you usually find tongs with an inch and half of caked on cheese from previous attempts to get cheese. Salad bar utensils are dumber than NASCAR.

As you can tell I have an enormous amount of free time to worry about things that really don't matter. If you have some items or activities that just don't make sense to you, let me know about them and we will create another story based on your frustrations.

 

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