Google Suggests These Towns are the ‘Armpits’ of Louisiana

(KMDL-FM) I don't know how the armpit earned the designation as the "low point" of the human body. It's been declared so much that now, in common vernacular, when one is speaking of a place that is deemed to be at the bottom of selected societal standards, it is called the "armpit". The search engine Google has deduced via its Artificial Intelligence abilities not one but two Louisiana communities that own that distinction.

READ MORE: Louisiana Town with One of the Most Mispronounced Names in America

Before we delve into which community is about to be really offended, let's take a look at the armpit. Personally, as a survivor of three torn rotator cuff surgeries, I am a fan of having a functioning armpit. It's where I keep both shoulders, and I have a custom armpit built for each side of my body.

No, that's not me in the picture. True, during the summer months and when I wear the same hoodie for days at a time, that part of the body can develop a very Bogalusa-like smell, but just like that city in southeastern Louisiana its only mildly offensive and not what I would consider to be totally off-putting.

Why Do Our Armpits Stink?

Another complaint about armpits is the stench. Yeah, I will give you that as a solid fact. That part of the body on both men and women can develop a malodorous, noisome, cacodorous presentation to the olfactory senses. For reference, if you've ever been in Carencro when the wind blows over the landfill or in Lake Charles when, well, just Lake Charles, you can get the idea.

Perhaps another reason the term armpit is used to describe something less than desirable is that the armpit tends to be unattractive. No, that's still not me in the picture, but we're getting closer.

Certainly, a silky and shaven underarm on an attractive person is not that distasteful, but a sweaty, hairy, stretch-mark-covered connection between the arm and the body is probably more in line with what people are thinking when they want to use armpit as an adjective.

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What City Is First Mentioned When You Google the Armpit of Louisiana?

According to Google, the Louisiana community that earns the top spot on its search results when you ask about Louisiana and its armpit is the town of Bastrop. The Google results suggest the town's declining population, it's run down appearance, and its high crime rate. I have never visited Bastrop, but here is what a small portion of the downtown area looks like.

Looks like a typical small town to me. But every town has its good side and its not-so-good sides. According to Reddit, the folks close to Bastrop call it Strop City, which sounds about as creative as Bastrop looks.

If Bastrop Is One Armpit of Louisiana, What's the Other Armpit?

The other city that jumps into prominence when you Google "armpit of Louisiana" is Natchitoches. Yeah, the same city that the folks at Southern Living call charming, others call Nack a Trash. Again, the reasons for the disparaging remarks are high crime, a higher cost of living, and "too many darn young people".  There is a university in Natchitoches; perhaps the older folks have an issue with kids being on their lawns.

READ MORE: Louisiana's Worst City to Live In Revealed - Yeah, It's Them Again

If you live in or are from Bastrop or Natchitoches, should you be offended and mad at Google? I guess you can, unless you stop to consider this. Without our arms, it's difficult to lift others. Without our armpits, we don't have the strength and ability to do any heavy lifting. So without Bastrop and Natchitoches, there could not and would not be any better towns lifted in Louisiana. So, Thank You.

So, the next time you drive to or through these two Louisiana towns, roll up your windows because there are criminals afoot, but take a moment to salute these communities because without them, we could be discussing your town.