Things You'll Never Hear Said in South Louisiana

I was chatting with a friend the other day about the weather in regards to how nice it has been lately. But we all know in a few days we'll be in the thick of summer.

The phrase that was uttered by my friend during our conversation that made me turn my head like a dog look at their goofy owner was: "It's not that humid outside today."

Yeah, words virtually never uttered in south Louisiana...ever!

That got me to thinking of things you just never hear in south Louisiana. With a lot of help from friends and listeners of 97.3 The Dawg, here's the running list.

It's a dry heat.
I should've bought a heavier jacket.
You can't eat that.
I didn't buy anything at Walmart today.
Let's go snowboarding.
Verot School Rd rocks!
I just read this article in the New York Times.
The drainage in Lafayette Parish is amazing.
Who's got a snow shovel I can borrow?
Mais that (animal of your choice) is too cute to put in a gumbo. Let's keep it as a pet.
I root for the Cajuns AND the Tigers, me.
How 'bout them Cowboys!
Roll Tide!
Y'all's tap water is so refreshing.
Is there anything besides health food here.
Want a beer? Nah, I'm good.
I'll never eat crawfish.
The humidity here is wonderful.
Good thing mosquitoes go away in the winter.
Baton Rouge traffic was great today!
I can't stand the smell of boudin and cracklins.
Wanna go swimming in the Vermilion River?
Sure, take a left on Johnston Street.
Gumbo, oh no, it's too hot for that.
Where can I find booze in this town?
No thanks, I don't need any Tony Chachere's.
Three pounds is enough.
You know, I've never been to Cowboy's.
No bread pudding for me, thanks.
I stir my roux clockwise.
Drive-thru daiquiris, that's a dumb idea.
Sulphur, Louisiana -- ah, smell that fresh air!
Poo, there's no good looking' ladies here.